Observations and inanities by a second-shift assistant supervisor in the Puppy-Grinding division of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy® (our motto: "Sure it's cruel, but think of the jobs!"), your host, Brent Rasmussen.
Genius Discovers That The Science Of Peanut Butter Disproves Evolution
Well, shoot. There's 2 minutes and 5 seconds of my one and only life I'll never get back. I could almost feel my brain cells atrophying as I watched this. Creationist Chuck Missler takes evolution-denial to a hilariously all-time low.
I sure hope that we make it through the next few years because shit like this is just depressing.
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I had never noticed
I just looked at my jar of Skippy, and the expiration date is October 12, 4.5 billion years from now.
Wow....
Where do these people come from? How did this country ever produce them in the first place?? Oh yea, religion..... Good ole religion.
Homeschool?
Fundamentalist homeschooling, duh!
caveat: I homeschool but not because I am religious and want to "protect" my vulnerable child from the evil secular public schools. I do it because of the evil political nonsense and non-education of public school politics and NCLB.
I was homeschooled because
I was homeschooled because public school is too slow and vacuous.
That southern politician who denies heliocentrism?
I *know* I read, a couple of months ago, about some southern politician who produced fundraising or campaign lit that questioned that wacky liberal idea that the earth goes around the sun. Seriously! We're talking not just pre-Enlightenment thinking, but pre-Renaissance...
But now I can't find that link. Any help appreciated!
The politician you are
The politician you are referring to may have been from Georgia.
Following article gave some KOS readers a chuckle.
www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1807059/posts?page=82
www.fixedearth.com
Yeah...
...it's out there. I know I mentioned it in a post, but I've just spent some time browsing through my stuff, can't find it. It was some Texas state legislator, if I remember correctly, who was pushing for more repressive legislation on evolution, who was quoting stuff from some kook fundie in like Alabama - who was the one who denies heliocentrism. Once it came out who the legislator was quoting, he backed off in embarassment.
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
howdy
You're thinking of Warren Chisum. I love Texas (7th generation, y'all).
The story really is remarkable - in a pound-your-head-repeatedly-against-nearest-wall kind of way. And he did back off, but I don't think he was nearly as embarrassed as he should have been.
http://www.offthekuff.com/mt/archives/008835.html
Behold, the power of dKos
Yup, that's the nutter I was thinking of - and likewise, thanks to the others downthread who supplied the 'fixedearth' info related to that. The power of the dKos hivemind is not to be underestimated. :)
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
If you spooned an entire jar of Skippy into his skull, it could
only help.
What are U talking about?
What are U talking about?
What a waste...
...of good peanut butter that would be.
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
Wow.
Wow.
And you just know there are people out there who see that and say, "What an amazing video - this is the argument that will convince everyone that evolution is fake."
I can't decide if it's more funny than horrifying yet.
Painful
GWARRRRRRRRR!
This man clearly did not go through even the most basic biology course. Just like the Roy Comfort banana video, this was painful to watch and listen to.
Thanks for sharing.
The thing that jumps out at me
is when the woman specifically calls evolution a "fairy tale." I swear the cornerstone of Christian apologetics technique is the "I'm rubber and you're glue" defense...
OMFG - that's infinitely stupid
"The entire food industry depends on the fact that evolution is false" - good grief! Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain.
- No More Mr. Nice Guy!
Really depressing.
Just think of the millions of hours that could have gone into something useful if only Darwin had opened a can of peanut butter. Now that is depressing.
Another funny thing is, even
Another funny thing is, even if life were spontaneously generated in peanut butter, you wouldn't open the jar, peel back the foil, and see it waving at you. It'd be microscopic. There might even have been some in that jar he opened - how would he know?
Evolution: A threat to our food supply.
I had a link to
I had a link to www.fixedearth.com, but when I tried it today it didn't work. Too bad, there was some hilarious debunking of the crazy idea that the earth revolves around the sun.
Great post. Terrifying. (It
Great post. Terrifying. (It migth be worth mentioning that the far-right yahoos do not the Christian faith define.)
I'm new to your blog; I poked around a bit and y'all have some good stuff- thank you. If any of you antheists intellectuals care to discuss faith, religion, and/or spirituality come check out www.maladroit.wordpress.com. I would love to get your perspective added to the conversation. I think Christians need to listen to what atheists and critics have to say if we are to be a positive force in this world.
Here it is
Jim, you are talking about the legendary Warren Chisum, the Chair of the Texas state House Appropriations Committee. The memo argues that "tax-supported evolution science is unlawful under the U.S. Constitution". Here is a linky to the actual memo he circulated, on behalf of Representative Ben Bridges of Georgia (see, they're connected!) along the pre-Enlightenment Fixed Earth Society propaganda. What is in the water over in Texas? LOL
http://www.capitolannex.com/IMAGES2/CHISUMMEMO.pdf
funny thing is, the jar of
funny thing is, the jar of peanut butter seems to have been opened before. meaning : he wasn't exactly sure ...
Does it matter if it's
Does it matter if it's creamy or chunky?.
What about microbial life?.
And they wonder why
we patronize them so?
All I can think of is Cletus, the slack-jawed yokel, from the Simpsons, "Stranger, you're a-trespassin' on my dirt farm."
"You better start giving me some inner peace before I mop the floor with you." - Homer S.
or
"Pinky, you excel at random." - the Brain
The Flat Earth Temptation
Did someone mention Warren Chisum and the infamous "Evolution is a religion based on Jewish cabbalism" memo ?
The same memo also referenced a website that claims the sun revolves around the Earth.
Back in February I broke the story about how some influential leaders in the Christian right think the Earth is at the center of the universe, that Copernicus got it wrong.
They're called "geocentrists"
Read all about it here :
Copernicus Was Wrong : Reconstructionism & "The Flat Earth Temptation"
nutty butter
I've just watched the peanut butter professor and...well, words fail me. I live in Skagit County Washington and strongly suspect that a significant percentage of the people who live in this county could watch this clip and say "well, there ya go. What more proof do ya need" then tilt their little pin heads and drool away to some other enlightening episode. Flat earthers everywhere. There aughta be a law!
gary
They just keep getting weirder...
I was just introduced to your web site, and I'm glad I found it! I am a member of the most discriminated minority in the world (or at least in the U.S.) - a non-believer, and it is refreshing to see a place where other members can meet and smile at the fundamentalists. Keep up the good work. Now I'm going to have a peanut butter sandwich. Hope I don't swallow any LGM (little green men)!
Orgin of life
REMINDER! Evolution does not explain the orgin of life! It exolains the orgin of species.
As Atrios might say, "The
As Atrios might say, "The stupid! IT BUUUUURNS!"
And now I'm going to go back myself a peanut butter and Jesus sandwhich.
A god question
This is somewhat off-topic, but also somewhat on-topic: A question for the religionists.
Yes, yes, I know, it's sort of like the god making a stone so big that it can't lift it thing... but it is an interesting question.
Mr Jiffy
How does this Einstein know he has never eaten "new life" in his peanut butter? Does he have microscopic vision?
And where does he thing bird flu, HIV, and many of the other "new" diseases came from, if evolution doesn't exist?
Also, his argument is really a strawman anyway. Evolution doesn't have anything to do with the creation of spontaneous life appearing where none was before (that's the domain of creationists for the most part). Evolution has to do with "new"... as in "unique"... forms of life changing ("evolving") from existing ones.
So perhaps Mr. Jiffy should simply look up "evolve" in the dictionary.
this is reminiscent of...
This is just like the argumentum ad bananum featured a while ago with Doogie Howser.
V Funny
I am an Australian & we do not in generally tend to be too religious. I was rolling on the floor laughing at this little video. We rarely see this side of creationists. I consider evangelicalists to be the same as Moslem fundamentalists. How do Americans allow these idiots to have any influence over them - although he would go down well at the Melbourne Comedy Festival - provided it was for 5 minutes or less.
Non sequitur of the year?
Let's say that God, being omnipotent, can spontaneously create new life, and even put it in a jar of peanut butter.
Doesn't that mean the entire food industry depends on the fact that God doesn't exist?
Wow! I think I just saw Jesus in my cracker for my peanut butter
I shall not imbibe in mass quantities of Amino Fuel intake and put my sweaty socks in the microwave...just on the off chance this man has interpreted evolutionary theory correctly and that it in fact holds true as such.
And was that the anti-smiley I saw in a post above?! Besides, if a new life form came from peanut butter, the food industry would just package it as meat or cultured. Hmm, what could he have arrived at had he picked on yogurt?
If you google "Fair
If you google "Fair Education Foundation" you can click on 'Cached' for www.fixedearth.com, title "The Earth Is Not Moving". I would guess this page was cut off by isp when it was brought to attention of too many KOS readers a few days ago. Just gaze at the page as a whole. The person that did it probably has a disorder and needs help.
"Far right" and the Christian Faith
I've made this point before on other blogs: The far-right HAS defined the Christian faith in America for the last 30-40 years. Because YOU have let them do it. Does it have to be that way? No. But it has been, because for some reason Christians in America have felt it to be in their interest to allow the extremists to define their religion. The reasons for that are legion, but suffice it to say that those who are not so extreme can allow themselves to feel that they are not so crazy, since they are at least not as wacko as "those people".
The Christian Faith is not defined by the theories of a few so-called liberal theologians. In the same way that Islam cannot defend itself from the violent use of the word Jihad by calling on the fact that Jihad CAN mean an internal struggle; the simple fact is that the majority of muslims understand the word to mean a violent struggle. That's its true definition. The theory, although interesting, is of no consequence in the real world. The same way, the fact that the vast majority of those who call themselves Christian (which are almost all fundamentalist, since most non-fundamentalists tend to identify themselves through their denomination, not through the generic word "Christian"), believe that gays are abominations, that all other religions are the work of the Devil, and that Atheists are nothing but agents of Satan in disguise. Whether or not YOU believe all those things matters not an iota to me. The simple fact is that the vast majority of "Christians" do, and those Christians who deem themselves "liberal" have simply allowed their religion to be defined that way.
On the other hand, there IS a movement in some evangelical circles to reclaim the Evangelical movement for a more tolerant, more loving Christ. But at this point, that movement is still at the margins of Christianity. It's really up to you to make Christianity mean in the world at large what you believe it to mean. You can't simply say, in the comfort of an inherently tolerant blog, that you disagree with the "far-right yahoos"; you have to actively fight them in your churches and in your media. If you are doing this, then more power to you. If you're not, what the hell are you waiting for?
I noticed that, too!
Obviously underscores the degree of confidence he has in his own theory!
Additionally, it makes one wonder what would happen if Kirk Cameron were to dip his intelligently-designed-banana in the peanut butter!!
Exactly!
I was thinking just the same thing. Mr. Preacher Man unintentionally raises an interesting point: how much new life is all around us, but never gets noticed? The answer could range anywhere from None to A Lot.
I can't even honestly claim that this particular argument against evolution is entirely stupid or useless. It could, for example, launch a useful classroom discussion, particularly for students lacking any background in biology.
No honest thinker would deny that Darwin's concept is counter-intuitive. All sorts of objections present themselves, but all the significant ones have been laid to rest by careful analysis and experimentation.
Nevertheless, any serious newcomer to evolutionary biology ought to think through some of those objections and satisfy him/herself that evolution really is the the only plausible explanation for what we observe.
Personally I'm glad the Christian Right raised their critique of evolution. I've learned a lot from debunking their naive arguments such as the Peanut Butter Proof.
To Mr. Jiffy
I'm sorry, but your semantic argument is fallacious -- whether the word "evolution" covers the origin of life is, first of all, a nontrivial question, and second of all, irrelevant to a creationist. Creationism asserts that life as we know it (or some superset of it; extinctions have happened in recent years) appeared intact some implausibly small number of years ago by God. Scholarly and commonsensical biology asserts that (1) life appeared by itself between three and four billion years ago, and (2) that appearance of life, by the natural processes of evolution, has become the explosive diversity we see today. If you're discussing creationism versus evolution, you actually do have to talk about both (1) and (2) as evolution unless you allow that a supernatural power created life and then it evolved: that's pretty much what they call intelligent design. (1) is actually stronger than (2), so debunking (1) should strongly suggest that (2) is also wrong. If you call the antithesis of creationism "evolution", then it should include both. Even if you don't, what he's talking about is pretty clear, anyway, even if it's ridiculous -- the fact that God hasn't smitten him down for being such a disrespectful loony is ample enough proof that God doesn't exist. (:
non-believers
Don't worry , your not alone. There are many non-believers out there, including myself. I find most of this pretty comical ("MY imaginary friend is BETTER than YOUR imaginary friend..") and pathetic as peanut butter. I live in Mormonville Arizona and the competing fairy tale teller interests are amazing. Some Christian group dropped off a DVD calling the Mormons "wrong" or some such shit. Can't wait to laugh through this one!
Love the site, just found it!!!
spontaneous life
Hey this could explain the food poisoning outbreak a couple of years ago in Australia from "contaminated" peanut butter! the manufacturer could be vindicated. It was spontaneously generated botulism. It just snuck in under the radar.
Don't slander Doogie
Don't slander Doogie Howser's good name!
It was Charles in Charge! No wait, it was Mike "Growing Pains" Seaver. The pain really began to grow after he left the show though.
Anyway, I can't decide whether this video is hilarious or painful. I suppose it's both at the same time.
That is completely wrong.
That is completely wrong. Science does not have a theory on the emergence of life and should not address it. Science needs to stick to science and not allow religon to push it into making stuff up. We might have ideas about how life emerged but that's it, no one knows.
they do that everywhere
A few months ago I got a postcard from the local Jehova's witnesses (damn it, I want to write Jenova's Witnesses, I want to write that so badly) saying that "the end to false religion was coming" and asking where I'd be and what I'd do if I was in one of the false ones. That, made me smile. In college yearly these CDs filled with Christian music would appear in the dorms. From the look of campus the next day they made exelent frisbees, and some of the students liked to microwave them to watch them spark (it's not often you get a CD you don't mind destroying).
God does not play dice with the universe. - Albert Einstein
But the Dungeon Master does! - me
Um, nooo...
Science DOES have theories about the emergence of life. The most popular, and the one I'm familiar with, is that large amounts of energy caused various molecules to randomly join together, making organic compounds. The more basic amino acids can be made in the lab, and even found on objects colliding with the earth. From there, we get increased organization as the predecessors of today's organelles form and operate independently, before coming together to create something like our idea of a cell. It's textbook evolution from there. I realize I'm not citing anything, but this can be found in intro biology textbooks--try Campbell's, or Purves et. al. It's declasse to cite intro bio textbooks, but I feel their explanations of the emergence of life give a strong indication that there ARE theories addressing this topic, not just crazy ideas from a few scientists.
Why do you say science should not address it? Ought not the origin of life be part of the study of life? Religion isn't pushing science to make anything up--it's not like science has to spit out a theory just to contradict the claims of creationists. Science seeks ever increasing knowledge and understanding--to claim that a question so fundamental to our understanding of ourselves should not be addressed is mystifying to me: why would you suggest that? Do you think it's unanswerable?
You're right, we have ideas about how life emerged, and no one knows for sure. That's science. That's everything. The whole goal of science is to refine itself to the point where all questions about the natural world are answered and answerable. A theory is a hypothesis that is consistent will all known data, that can't be proven wrong, at this point, and that has wide support among scientists, at this point. I would say that if Campbell can publish a textbook that is used in undergraduate institutions all over the country without major backlash from the scientific community for information that is perceived to be faulty, there must be some degree of consensus.
counter-intuitive?
Just call evolution "cause and effect over time" and it seems pretty damned obvious.
My favorite creationist (evolution-denier), I met here in Texas, worked at a cattle ranch breeding for herd improvement, even utlizing artificial insemination with mail-ordered bull semen. No contradiction? C-c-c-razy, babeeee.
Welcome...
...to you both, and anyone else who stops by for a visit - be sure to check out this post by dKos FP-maven Darksyde his-own-self. It helps. It really does.
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
Mr Jiffy (and all others)
So What!!! Creationism, evolution, big bangs, spaghetti monsters, aliens.... Why not just get on with life and use the short time that we have to make the place a little better for each other? Just one tiny bit better each day for one other person. Forget about why, forget about after-life. Just help someone a little bit each day.
This is help
Did it ever occur to you that this and everything else along this path (i.e. debunking bad science) is actually "make the place a little better for each other".
I for one think that we can't let crap like this just stand unchallenged. If people do nothing, they're gonna accept crap like this by default. This is helping.