Observations and inanities by a second-shift assistant supervisor in the Puppy-Grinding division of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy® (our motto: "Sure it's cruel, but think of the jobs!"), your host, Brent Rasmussen.
Baptists For Brownback 2008
Giving Landover Baptist a run for their money! Baptists For Brownback 2008!
[link] Today, in an America filled with adulterers and baby-killers, an even worse sinner casts a shadow over them all—the atheist. Yet atheists are difficult to spot. They hide their sinister cult behind masks of smiles, science and soft, pleasant voices. Your next door neighbor might be an atheist. You just can’t tell.
Imagine if it was simple to identify atheists and their tainted works. Would it not be grand? Think how much easier it would be to protect your children’s eyes, ears and souls from atheists’ influences if their websites, books, movies and yes, even their very clothes, were clearly labeled with a bright scarlet “A”.
Curses! Those godly folks have somehow conspired to place one of those scarlet "A"s on UTI as well! Now if I can only keep UTI from being listed on their Hellbound list... **shakes fist**
Bookmark/Search this post with:
If you like Baptists for
If you like Baptists for Brownback, you have got to check out Blogs4Brownback. Its hilarious! There is also a link at the site to purchase "Heliocentrism is an Atheist Doctrine" gear.
Brilliant. n/t
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
Sorry Mrs. Gaines your book
Sorry Mrs. Gaines your book says that I cannot be forgiven, I've said there is no god (many many many times) so there is no point looking for salvation now. Plus even if I'm wrong and that bible is right I would still not worship to such a vile an petty creator as your god character.
I didn't realize the site was a parody, who can tell? Was the troll a parody too? If so then I'm the dupe, oh well it was funny if it was a parody, its funny and sad if its not.
Pray For Forgiveness!
I'm gonna pray for each and every one of you who have besmirched the name of one of the Godliest women it has ever been my pleasure to meet. Shame on y'all! What has this country come to when love of your country and the God that created it is laughed at and mocked? When standing up for your faith brings not righteousness but ridicule?
It just turns your stomach!
God is Love!
BBN
Damn, that's funny!
Damn, BBN, your site is great parody!
...
...it is parody, right? It's getting hard to tell sometimes...
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
Actually no
It just turns your stomach. Mine has no angular momentum whatsoever.
...
Ain't you just the funniest little lie-beral that ever that ever cried out for mercy just a little too late.
Keep laughing, son.
No sense of humor
You sound just like the Muslims.
OOh!
I haven't played "mercy" in a long time. I'll have to revisit that little game and see if I can still make my little brother beg for it.
Best Parody I've Seen Recently
Why can't movies be as funny as them? And they're free!
May God have mercy on you
Normally I would never enter a site that proudly proclaims their hatred for Christianity. However, I feel that it is my duty, as a woman of faith, to reach out to you this once and talk to you about the Lord Jesus Christ. Did you know in order for you to gain entrance to the Kingdom of God that you need only accept that Jesus, son of God, died for your sins? That and the fact that you would have to give up your wicked, lewd, lifestyles. A life of pure and chaste living is nothing when compared to spending all of eternity in Hell. I hope you will think long and hard about that.
Praying for your salvation, but not wasting too much time as I see you as a lost cause.
Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett
Going against god
You are going against god and turning the hearts and minds of men against god with your false doctrine of fire and brimstone.
sin of pride
Putting your religion above the religions of others can be seen as an act of pride. Their are billions of people not of your religion. You sin against several BILLION people in the 1 act of putting your religion above the religions of others.
you have no faith in god
You have no faith in god. You believe any atrocity attributed to god. How hard would it be for you to believe that their is no hell simply because god loves us. Their is no need to earn gods love because gods love is an absolute it's gaurnteed.
eternity in hell
I have seen god and god is a loving being beyond anything you can imagine. You slander god and spread blasphemy against god by preaching a doctrine of hell fire in the name of god.
accept that christ died for my sins.
I will never accept human sacrifice as a viable method of earning the acceptance of god.
Praise De Lawd!
Thank you, Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett, for showing me the way, the truth, and the life.
Say, not to nit-pick or anything, but you do know of course that to hyphenate your last name like that can be considered the sin of Pride. Not to mention showing a shocking disrespect to Mr. Crockett, your Christian husband and the head of your household, your master.
You'd better get right with Our Lord first and remove the beam from your own eye before having the gall to come over here and point out the splinter in mine.
Hmph. Some Christian you turned out to be.
plank in your eye
Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett
"You'd better get right with Our Lord first and remove the beam from your own eye before having the gall to come over here and point out the splinter in mine."
Mr. Brent Rasmussen is denying the verifiablity of your god and questioning certain unseemly practices of the church while you Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett have been fanaticaly slandering the name of god and turning the hearts and minds of men against god.
Blasphemy Challenge
Mrs. Gaines-Crockett,
I am sure you are a very nice old lady and you only mean the best, but do you really think we are skeptics because we have never heard the "good news"? Why do all Christianists assume that if only they could corner me and get me to listen, I would change my 'wicked, lewd lifestyle'? I hear the religious kooks talk about me and say things like "he is hungering for the Lord". No. I am NOT HUNGRY!
The truth is, I feel sorry for you. You have spent years of your life praying to someone who is not there. How much of your hard earned money have you willingly donated to con men too lazy to get real jobs? You poor lady, it may take years to deprogram you from your brainwashing, but we are here to help. From now on, I want you to read UTI every day until you are cured. Also, I want you to take the blasphemy challenge. Trust me, nothing happens. God won't strike you down because there is no such thing.
See you tomorrow.
Dirk
Whew!
Had me going there for a moment.
A minute or so later, my writer's eye picked up "They hide their sinister cult behind masks of smiles, science and soft, pleasant voices," and wanted to rewrite it as the sibilant hiss of "They disguise their sinister sect behind masks of smiles, science and sweet seductive voices."
...
I'm waiting for the first Big Red A tattoo to show up.
tattoo
I'm not much of one for tattoo's I have exactly 0 at the moment, but there is a part of me that would really like a nice big red A on me...
or "ubi dubium ibi libertas"
or if I were a much bigger computer nerd,
010010010010000001100001011011010010000001100001011101000110100001
100101011010010111001101110100
Which is "I am Atheist" in binary. and you know there are 10 kinds of people in the world those who know binary and those who don't.
The Invisible Pink Unicorn is an option
the simple nothing symbol would work
or the humanist guy
the american atheists have a nice logo, I might leave out the A because I prefer to ignore nationalism, If you wish to study a grandfaloon just remove the skin of a toy balloon.
A tire tread going diagonal across my back would be cool, has nothing to do with atheism I'm just a car guy.
Sorry I have too many friends that are very into tattoos and I find them interesting, oh and I ramble.
Anyone else find it scary
Anyone else find it scary how easily you could at first assume that they're serious?
They aren't serious?
I thought they were serious. Are you saying their not?
Are they serious?
Damned if I can tell. I have to believe they're not ... but plenty of their readers/commenters think they are.
I googled "Tobin Maker" and couldn't find anything substantial.
The real meat of the site is in the comments, which appear to be authentic, and contain not only defenders of atheists and freethrough, but also butt-nasty attacks against atheists from apparent Christians.
That site should come with a warning...
...for those frail souls who cannot take snark in concentrated doses. Even hardened old warrior as I am, I found myself weakened with laughter...
Jim Downey
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.
Comments even funnier than the post
LOL - I can't be certain (since some may just be playing along) but it looks like they hooked a few.