Observations and inanities by a second-shift assistant supervisor in the Puppy-Grinding division of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy® (our motto: "Sure it's cruel, but think of the jobs!"), your host, Brent Rasmussen.
If It Walks Like A Duck...
Wanted - female between 2 and 4 years old with a voice like a duck, the body of a Banyan tree, the chest of a lion, flawless skin, hair, eyes, and teeth, and is not afraid of the dark, to represent the powerful Hindu deity "Royal Kumari" at Kathmandu in Nepal.
What's that? What is the reason why the current representation of the deity, Preeti Shakya, 11, who has held the position since she was four years old, cannot continue as the deity's earthly vessel you ask?
Well, shoot! You know! *blush* She might - *garsh!* - become all womanly and such! *blush blush* It wouldn't be seemly!
[link] “If we don't change her now we'll have to wait until next year, which could be late,” said Deepak Bahadur Pandey, of the Trust Corporation, which oversees the Kumari search. “It is inauspicious if the girl starts menstruating while serving as Kumari.”
Inauspicious indeed! Wow. You can't make-up crazy like that! That's comedy gold right there. Heheh...
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At least they don't perform
At least they don't perform some hideous mutilation on her to stop her maturing, or outright kill her. :P I wonder what one does for a career after retiring from goddesshood?
Faceless,
Maybe they're all gathered together in some retirement home. The old Pink Floyd song, 'The Fletcher Memorial Home' comes immediately to mind.
IMHO, one of the best songs ever written. And I'd say it can be applied with gusto to all the old gods too!
Edited to add, from one of the finest anti-war albums of all time too--"The Final Cut".
awesome
I looked up the song and got quite a laugh. You're right, and that is an great song!
What Kumari Means
In the context of the religion, it does make sense that a new stand-in for the goddess would have to be found before the present one starts menstruating. The word "kumari" means "little girl," specifically one that has not yet achieved puberty, in Sanskrit. Having a menstruating Kumari would be like having a Jewish pope in the Catholic context.
A Jewish Pope?
Maybe that's what the stodgy old fuddy-duddys in the Catholic Church need!
"Oy, a broch! This freakin' pope-dress is killing me!"
"Yes, your eminence."
"My what-sis? Speak up! Bring me some nice Manischewitz, there's a good boy."
Damn whipersnappers today
You know, back in my day our deities lasted, not like these new-fangled, all-flash-no-substance deities today. Pssh; 6 years? 7 years, tops?
I tell you what; we knew how to keep our deities from menstruating.
Rob Miles
--
There are only 10 types of people in the world;
those who understand binary and those who don't.
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