You, too (or your SO), can be uncut!

Jim Downey's picture

Whatsamatter, kid? That ol' nasty Christian religion take away your foreskin? Thinking that you've been missing out on something? That your boy parts have become desensitized and worn a little rough around the edges from the trials of day-to-day living?

Well, cheer up, me lad, there's now hope for the likes of you: An Artificial Foreskin!

Yes, you grew up thinking that once that little snip-snip was done, that was the last of your foreskin. But now, thanks to the Miracle of Modern Technology, you too can be as nature intended! No more being envious of the Other Heathens who didn't sacrifice their foreskins for Christ - you can become "dekeratinized" and enjoy the full glory of an untrimmed bit of trim. So to speak.

Let SenSlip - "the world's first ever artificial retractable foreskin for circumcised men" (what, they think someone's already made one for women???) be your salvation. Full photos and video here (decidedly boring, but still NSFW).

[Wow, they really will sell just about anything, won't they?]

Jim Downey

(Via BoingBoing, just in case you thought I was some kind of perv who went out looking for this sort of thing.)

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Crudely Wrott's picture

Well, if that's all it takes

Well, hell! What's the hold up? Let's just all run out and get us one. I know I will!

I guess I just never new what I was missing. And I'll bet you're just like me!

(Hoo boy).

grizzlymaze's picture

sliced

I moved to America from Scotland four years ago with my 2 two boys. Within a few weeks of being here a woman asked me if they had been circumsised. Kind of a weird question to be asked of me don't you think? Anyhow, when I replied, "ofcourse not" she went on to tell me that they would be regarded as unusual and unclean amongst other American boys. My goodness, this really preyed on my mind and I began to get a little paranoid about it. Upon investigation I later learned that it is not so unusual in the States after all. Why on earth this cruel and ridiculous practice continues at all I will never understand. And why is circumsision still popular in the US and not so elsewhere? Apart from being unneccessary and archaic, it kind of looks a bit stupid too.
Whatever floats your boat is cool I suppose, but to impose this against the will of a minor is simply wrong.
Like Hank said, 'interesting' product.

Jim Downey's picture

Plain ol' ritual mutilation.

First off, grizzlymaze, welcome - it takes some special kind of nerve/crazy to have moved to this country four years ago.

Nextly, yeah, the whole thing is just plain bizarre. And that's coming from someone who was cut as a kid and has never known anything different (from an experienced POV). It's clearly ritual mutilation of the most primitive variety, to mark the boys as part of 'the club'. I am glad that it's done less frequently now, and do indeed hope that the practice is stopped altogether - at least as a regular procedure inflicted on children. Adults can do what they want.

Jim Downey

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read *or listen to* my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.

grizzlymaze's picture

Crazy indeed!

Thanks Jim.
The plan was that our time in the US would be short-lived and an opportunity for the kids to experience a different way of life. Just as we were making plans to go back home my son developed leukemia. And whilst they do have great doctors in the UK I am pretty impressed with the care here. Also the survival rates are higher. So, by choice, we are stranded here. For the time being at least.
Sorry to ramble on.
And I agree 100%, a crazy thing to do. And you know what they say about the grass being greener, well its not true!! I learned the hard way.
Slainte,
Stephanie

Steve James's picture

My SO doesn't need one--I let her use mine.

As a naturally whole male in the US, which used to make me a rarity, I have to come down on the side of non-mutilation of babies, and/or adults. But you know how some people are when it comes to being like everybody else. I do know adults who have been circumsized because they didn't feel that they 'fit in' and parents who elected it for their babies for the same reason. I find that even more ridiculous than religious reasons. And not just from my natural reluctance to have a guy with a skinning knife going after Willy. (The vasectomy was bad enough, but at least they gave me Valium for that one.)

I mean, do boys really laugh at one another in the locker room over things like this? I don't know how it is today, but checking out the other guys' equipment in my high school would have led to serious interpersonal sanctions.

Then again, I dumped the Boy Scouts as soon as I figured out that they wanted me to go camping in February. (My older brother, characteristically, dumped them after going camping in February, thus confirming my view that I was 20% smarter than he.)

So is it now fashionable to be uncut?

Incidentally, the only reason I was not chopped? They didn't expect me to live.

Steve "Take that, Dr. Loving" James

Hank Fox's picture

Laughing in the Gym

I never got laughed at in a locker room.

I think the ideal answer, if it did come up in high school gym class would be, "You're looking at my dick?!? Jeez, man, whatever."

The answer I have ready today, if anybody ever mentions it, is "Hey, it's in Stealth Mode. Allows it to get a lot closer to the target before it's detected."

As to "fashionable," I've read the trend is to NOT have it done to your kids. I imagine a future moment when kids read about this in school and go "They did WHAT?" It'll be the same type of thing as slavery, or manufacturing eunuchs for the church choir.

Tom's picture

I'm with Hank

As usual I agree with Hank. Mutilating a baby in this way cannot be justified. I hope that one day it is seen as a crime of assault. How could anyone possibly see it any other way? Because it is customary? That's the same nonsense reason that perpetuates religion.

If anyone had done this to me I would be livid (with a capital LIV).

And before anyone says it is more hygenic, I've got a reply to that. They've discovered this new thing called 'washing' these days.

Hank Fox's picture

Ahem. Cough, cough.

Well, it's an interesting product.

I can't help but wonder about the development phase of the thing. How much discussion, how much product testing there was. "Chief, the natural rubber version is a definite no-go, and we're getting reports of severe allergies and chafing in the PVC model."

A better plan, in my opinion, is to leave babies with the parts they're born with. I've always thought circumcision was a stupid, stupid idea. It's ripe for jokes, and I've made 'em, but behind the jokes, the idea is strangely horrifying. Surgery. Elective surgery. On babies. For no good reason.

To paraphrase Homer Simpson's "Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?" ...

Religion. Is there anything bad it can't do?

BrainArmor's picture

You missed the best part

At the end of the bullet points extolling the virtues of the SenSkin was this gem:

A feeling of warmth, security and self-esteem.

Just what all men need, a package for their package.

iheartmitochondria's picture

it probably is - i'm not

it probably is - i'm not most people.

iheartmitochondria's picture

This is hilarious!!!! I'm

This is hilarious!!!! I'm so glad I don't have a penis. :-)

Jim Downey's picture

Thanks -

I worry sometimes that my sense of humor is too, ah, esoteric, for most people . . .

Jim Downey

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Like Science Fiction? Read *or listen to* my novel, Communion of Dreams, for free.

iheartmitochondria's picture

why can i never post in the

why can i never post in the correct place?

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