New Fox Faith Drama - CCSI - Creationist Crime Scene Investigators!

Les over at Stupid Evil Bastard seems to attract the creationist morons like a flame attracts moths. He has had a hilarious, but frustrating email exchange with an ignorant youngster named "Paolo" who seems to suffer from uncontrollable creationist cut-n-paste syndrome.

It'd be funny if it weren't so depressing.

In any case, one of Les' commenters, a person using the handle "Mayo", came up with a fantastic idea for a gritty new creationist crime drama. You think Fox's new faith-based TV network will pick it up?

[Mayo] Here’s a typical T.V. detective movie in Paolo's world.

Detective- We found your fingerprints all over the murder weapon.

Criminal- Did you actually see me use it?

Detective- No....but the prints are undeniable.

Criminal- You have NO PROOF. You saw nothing.

Detective- Look fella...your semen is all over the place. We’ve matched your DNA.

Criminal- If you didn’t actually observe the semen leaving my body....what you’re spewing is just a theory. YOU HAVE NO PROOF!

Detective- What about these footprints which perfectly match your highly rare shoe type?

Criminal- Did you see me step there?

Detective- Not exactly.

Criminal- You’ve got no proof then. You’re just guessing.....badly.

Detective- You have blood which matches the victim all over you. How do you explain that?

Criminal- Did you see this blood get on me?

Detective- No. The spray pattern and condition of the blood all point to the fact that you must have been in the path of the bleeding artery at the time and place where the victim was killed though.

Criminal- More guessing. Is there anything else you’re any good at? You may want to consider a new line of work.

Detective- I guess you can go now. Sorry to have bothered you. Roll credits.