Atheism Anecdotes

Jeff Mullin is a "Senior Writer" for the Enid, Oklahoma News & Eagle newspaper. A few years ago he wrote an article "poking fun" at atheists for having the unmitigated gall to suggest that traditional god-belief was exactly the same as belief in an Invisible Pink Unicorn (blessed be Her unseen curly mane.) He subsequently received a letter from an atheist who asked him what gave him the right to ridicule atheists for their lack of belief?

Nothing, apparently. He just likes to ridicule atheists. So, nice Christian guy that he is, he decided to do it again. This time in a column dripping with insincere pity for the poor, deluded atheists.

How very thoughtful of him.

More below the fold...

Some days, there's nothing I like better than to go find a forum somewhere where a Christian (normally) is trying to convert an atheist.
I used to be a regular forum poster at Austin Cline's About Atheism forum, but after a year or so, I seemed to have little enough to say any more. But I still like to read them, even if responding to the threads seems pointless any more. I hope to regain some desire for re-engagement soon, but it's no challenge to plink at such a large target. OE's (Online Evangelists) are a game permanently stuck in god mode. And like video game zombies, there are always hordes more of them banging on the door, no matter how easily they go down.

But I do enjoy reading the fight, especially in the morning. It angries up the blood.

This morning, on the forum of my local newspaper, The Indianapolis News (which is either a wholly-owned organ of the Republican Party or staffed entirely by Gun-snatching, Constitution-hating, ACLU-membering Nazi Communists, depending on who is complaining at the time), I read through a lengthy and pointless...and ongoing...clash between an atheist and an OE.

Illinois state Rep. Monique Davis has apologized to Rob Sherman, who has graciously accepted her apology, for attempting to deny him his civil rights in a public hearing that he was invited to testify before last week.

Apparently it's OK to be a bigoted, unconstitutional, theocratic asshole if you're having a bad day.

One of our favorite guys, Rob Sherman, testified before the Illinois House State Government Administration Committee on Wednesday related to Gov. Rod Blagojevich's proposed $1 million grant intended for Pilgrim Baptist Church, and was blindsided by wackjob theocrat Rep. Monique Davis who seems to think that atheists don't have any right to exist, and that we are "dangerous to children".

[link] Davis: I don’t know what you have against God, but some of us don’t have much against him. We look forward to him and his blessings. And it’s really a tragedy -- it’s tragic -- when a person who is engaged in anything related to God, they want to fight. They want to fight prayer in school.

I don’t see you (Sherman) fighting guns in school. You know?

I’m trying to understand the philosophy that you want to spread in the state of Illinois. This is the Land of Lincoln. This is the Land of Lincoln where people believe in God, where people believe in protecting their children.… What you have to spew and spread is extremely dangerous, it’s dangerous--

Sherman: What’s dangerous, ma’am?

Davis: It’s dangerous to the progression of this state. And it’s dangerous for our children to even know that your philosophy exists! Now you will go to court to fight kids to have the opportunity to be quiet for a minute. But damn if you’ll go to [court] to fight for them to keep guns out of their hands. I am fed up! Get out of that seat!

Sherman: Thank you for sharing your perspective with me, and I’m sure that if this matter does go to court---

Davis: You have no right to be here! We believe in something. You believe in destroying! You believe in destroying what this state was built upon.

You can listen to the whole sordid thing here.

(Tip of the ballcap to Twitter and Hemant!)

It's a serious question. Many of us who are non-believers nonetheless are in family or other situations where some kind of participation or observation of this most important of Christian holidays.

Many times, even after I had left my Catholic faith far behind, I would attend Easter sunrise services with friends, or spend the day with family. My maternal grandmother always put out a big spread of food, and throughout the day the family would come by and try to avoid eating it (she was an OK cook, but her safe-food-handling skills were notoriously bad, and almost always someone in the family would get hit with a mild case of food poisoning).

Lots of atheists will still decorate eggs, or give the kids candy for Easter, because it is so much a part of the culture.

For me and my wife, it is just a routine day - since my mother-in-law passed on last month, we no longer need to even pretend to observe the holiday. But this is perhaps the first time in several years when I'm not doing *anything* in connection with the day.

So, what are you doing today?

Jim Downey

The convenience store was busy this morning. It's kind of a "last chance" stop before the commuters heading out to the power plant turn off the highway, so it's busy most mornings. I grabbed a black coffee and a newspaper and stood in line to check out. Eventually the line shortened and I ended up at the counter. I placed my coffee and newspaper down and reached for my wallet when I noticed something odd about the clerk.

"Hey," I gestured with a friendly smile, "you have a little smudge there on your forehead." I snagged a Kleenex from the box thoughtfully provided for customers between the registers and handed it to him.

I looked down at my wallet and dug out my debit card. When I looked up again I was taken aback... The guy was glaring at me!

Nervously I asked him, "is there something wrong?"

I saw him visibly struggle to settle himself down. "That'll be $2.75, Sir."

Then I remember. Today is Ash Wednesday. He's a Catholic, or some other sect that practices this particular ritual. "Ahhh... ," I said, with another smile to take the edge off his anger. "I didn't realize what today was."

He rang up my purchase, swiped my card, and I punched in my PIN.

"How," he asked with a supercilious sneer barely under control, "can anyone not realize it's Ash Wednesday?"

"Well, I'm an atheist, um," I peered at his name tag, "'David'. I don't usually keep tabs on every religion's quaint little rituals."

Then the minimum wage, pimply convenience store clerk, who happened to be participating in a stone age public religious ritual, with freakin' palm frond ashes that were rubbed onto his forehead by a magical shaman, has the gall to look at me like I was the crazy one.

I understand it was horrible. Andy Rooney's fangs speared from his demonic slash of a mouth, ripping the Christian flesh off of poor, poor evangelist Tony Didlo's throat, spilling his blood in the street like a fountain. Then Andy Rooney howled like a wolf and started rooting around in Didlo's guts while he cried for mercy from the curmudgeonly old atheist. Random atheists on the street - you know, because there's so many of us - cheered as Rooney smeared blood all over his face and swung a loop of intestine around and around, smacking the whimpering, dying Christian witness repeatedly in the face.

Then he went to the Super Bowl and enjoyed the game, leaving the evangelist dead in the streets of Phoenix, like us atheists always do when we come across defenseless Christians.

[Baptist Press] PHOENIX (BP)--As thousands of people thronged Phoenix for the Super Bowl, a small contingent of Christians spread out across the metropolitan area to share their faith in Christ.

One of them had a chance to talk with Andy Rooney, the commentator whose curmudgeonly complaints wrap up the weekly "60 Minutes" program on CBS.

"I was standing on a corner and turned around and there was this little old man walking across the street," said Tony Didlo, a member of Grace Church, a Southern Baptist congregation in Des Moines, Iowa. "I knew right away it was Andy Rooney."

Didlo held out a Gospel tract and asked Rooney if he had received one yet.

"Yeah, I've got one of those," Rooney replied, according to Didlo's account of the Jan. 31 encounter.

"Sir, do you believe in God?" Didlo asked.

"No, I'm an atheist," Rooney said. "I think it's sad you people believe in that stuff."

Didlo tried to pursue the conversation, asking if the existence of creation didn't imply a creator, but Rooney's cameraman stepped in between them and said, "We've got to go."

"He wouldn't let me go any further with it," Didlo said. "I was surprised he thinks people are totally off their rockers for believing in God."

Hello All,

This is my review of Vox Day's new book called "The Irrational Atheist". I'd like to make some things perfectly clear before I proceed with this review. I am still, and barring some pretty convincing evidence that I find personally credible, will most likely always be an atheist. What I mean by "atheist", as I have written volumes about in the past, is someone in whom god-belief of any kind is absent.

I have lately (within the last few years) come to the conclusion that the entire social and political "atheist movement" is a big, fat exercise in futility. Atheists are not, in any way, shape, or form, a "group" in the same sense that Methodists, Shriners, or Republicans are a group. The atheists who blog and organize activist marches and identify themselves as part of this "atheist movement" group are lying to themselves. There is no "atheist group". Rather, a movement has emerged and become politically active lately that has co-opted the perfectly reasonable descriptive word "atheist" and has twisted its meaning into something that I do not agree with, endorse, or really even recognize any longer. Ellen Johnson telling all of us atheists to "Vote your atheism first..." was the last straw for me. I mean, what in the heck does that even mean? I am not a member of your little club, Ellen.

I have my own opinions, political views, and values. I have my own, personal rationale for being a person in whom god-belief is absent (an atheist). I recognize no "atheist leaders" or spokesmen, and I endorse no one who claims to speak for me, or insinuates that they speak for me in any way.

I speak for myself, and myself alone.

I find it troubling that one of the recent trends in the "atheist blogger" community is to label someone who does not seem to toe the party line as an "appeaser" or as a "concern troll". It's complete crap. I didn't sign a fucking "atheist loyalty oath", and my lack of belief in a god isn't dependent on kowtowing to the self-anointed leaders of this misguided abortion of a political movement, whether or not they exist. If after this review someone uses the "no true Scotsman" fallacy on me in this fashion, they can go fuck themselves. With a jagged stick. Sideways. The political and social issues that concern me - personal liberty, civil liberties, honesty, personal responsibility, fiscal responsibility, freedom, justice, the American Way, all of that, don't require my allegiance to some new political movement. I was concerned with those things before I started calling myself an atheist, and I still am today. Atheism has nothing at all to do with any of that stuff. (See my first paragraph above.) Nether does "theism" for that matter.

I evaluate the books I read, the beliefs I come across, and the philosophies I examine fully, and with an eye towards the facts. I have a highly-sensitive bullshit meter, honed through 20-plus years of discussion, research, study, debate, and arguments with theists (that is, folks in which god-belief of any kind is present.) So, when you read the review below, keep in mind that I was really, really trying hard to find something that I could latch onto and argue intelligently and forcefully against. I was positive that it had to be there. I had my BS meter cranked up to 11 as I read through the book twice in an attempt to sniff out something that I could use - and the damned thing only went off a couple of times, and only when Day was explicitly talking about God and/or Jesus and his personal belief in the Christian mythology.

Shit. Double shit.

Ah, well. I am ethically and morally bound to review TIA honestly, and that is what I will do - regardless of how much it hurts me to do so. Heh. ;)

So, hang on to your hats and join me below the fold.

Romney's exclusion of secular and atheist Americans from his rose-colored vision of a happily religious "Stepford wives" America was despicable, to say the least. Now the Huckabee camp in the person of Huckabee aide Ed Rollins gets in on a little atheist-bashing action by using the term as an epithet against Romney aide Ron Kaufman on the Chris Matthews show Hardball. And they all have a laugh at how ridiculous it was to call Kaufman an atheist.

Hah hah hah! Chuckle chuckle, elbow in the ribs. Isn't it so silly to say that a top aide to one of the Presidential campaign's front-runner candidates is a dirty, stinking, filthy godless atheist? Why, what could be more far-fetched? Everyone knows that atheists can't be in powerful political positions!

Silly Ed Rollins - what a merry jokester you are!

Oh wait - I mean bigoted asshole. Yeah, that's what I meant.

Mitt Romney appeared on Meet The Press with Tim Russert, and immediately Russert hammered him with the atheist/atheism question. Romney stumbled a bit, but managed not to wedge his foot too firmly in his mouth, I thought.

But what in the heck is this "common bond of humanity" he says that he shares with atheists? Is the Mittster a Humanist now? He's trying too hard. He seems to be trying to be all things to all people, and that's just a recipe for disaster.

Transcript below the fold...

Heather Fluit, a columnist with the Volante Online University Of South Dakota student newspaper writes a pretty good article about Christmas and how students of different faiths, as well as non-believing students at USD choose to celebrate the holiday. She gets the obligatory definition of "agnostic" and "atheism" about half-right:

[Heather Fluit] Agnosticism is defined as neither faith nor disbelief in God, while atheism is the belief that God or a higher being does not exist.

Um... no. I don't know why she chose the tortured double-negative syntax to describe agnosticism because it makes it difficult to read and understand what she is trying to say, and a positive belief in no-god can be a part of atheism. In truth, agnosticism is "without knowledge", and atheism is "without god belief".

The two terms are not points along the same line. In other words, they are on two completely separate lines.

One set of terms - "gnosticism" and "agnosticism" - deal with knowledge. Specifically, whether or not knowledge of a god or gods is even possible.

The other set - "theism" and "atheism" - deal with whether god belief is present or absent within a human being.

So, the commonly-held understanding of "agnosticism" as being a fancy way of saying "I don't know", and a middle or moderate position between two extremes is a complete and utter misconception. A comfortable fantasy perpetuated by folks who don't understand what the words mean.

In reality, there is no "middle ground" between atheism and theism. Either god belief is present, or it is absent. It is on or off, black or white, there or not-there.

So, a person may be both an atheist, AND an agnostic. That is to say, god belief is not present within them (atheism), and they hold the position that knowledge of a god or gods is not possible (agnosticism).

I know - not a ground-breaking post, but it irks me sometimes that everyone seems to get this wrong - when it is so simple. This adds to my conviction that the words are drifting away from us and that we probably need to stop using them soon. The general human usage of the words is being co-opted by the colloquial meanings.

Very funny mockumentary about a "born again atheist preacher" and his "Church of Nothing" from Goodiebag.tv.

(Tip of the Stetson to Kirby over at Goodiebag.tv. Good stuff Kirby! Keep 'em coming!)

Here at UTI we have done this countless times before, but it is always very effective. I only had to change "atheist" into "Jew" twice, and one phrase "no evidence for the existence of God" into "no evidence that Jesus was the messiah."

What if Philip Pullman were a Jew? Would the book banning and movie hysteria make sense then? Would it be acceptable?

You decide.

[link] Board agrees to review British Jew's novels
Panel will evaluate literary, not religious, merits of Pullman book, educator says

JAMES RUSK

November 23, 2007

After a complaint that The Golden Compass, a popular children's fantasy book, was written by a professed Jew, the Halton Catholic District School Board is taking the book off shelves in school libraries while it reviews its suitability for students.

But the religious opinions of award-winning British author Philip Pullman will not be an issue when the book is read and reviewed by a committee of 15 people, who will pass their assessment on to the board for a decision, said Rick MacDonald, the board superintendent of education in charge of curriculum.

"It is the book we look at, not the author," said Mr. MacDonald, who said the board has also removed the other two books in Mr. Pullman's trilogy, His Dark Materials, from the shelves while they are reviewed by board librarians.

The public attention to The Golden Compass, first published in 1996, has been heightened because a film starring Nicole Kidman based on the novel - the first book of the trilogy - is about to go into distribution.

Mr. Pullman's views on religion are no secret. He said, for instance, in a 2002 question-and-answer session with readers of the newspaper The Guardian, that he saw no evidence that Jesus was the messiah.

Queen's University English literature professor Shelley King said the issue of whether the board should take Mr. Pullman's books from the shelf came up yesterday with her third-year class, and she and her students agreed it is a difficult question.

"It depends whether you are more interested in doctrine or in literary excellence. If your choice of reading matter is doctrinally driven, and you are not interested in challenges to received doctrine, then by all means, Pullman is not the man you want kids reading," Dr. King said.

Gordon Davies, head of languages, arts and sciences at the school of continuing education at the University of Toronto, said the school board's action has to be put into context.

It is not asking that the book not be read, sold or lent by a public library, said Dr. Davies, an expert on Catholic education.

"All the school board is saying is that it has a responsibility to provide education within the Catholic faith," Dr. Davies said.

Heheh... very funny stuff from LivelyIvy.

(Tip of the ballcap to Hemant.)

Us poor, poor atheists. So lost, with no redeeming social value. Enemies to all that is good and true and right.

At least, that's what Dr. Roger Olson, a professor of theology in George W. Truett Theological Seminary at baylor University would like you to think.

Oh, he loves us individual, lost little atheists, but considers atheism to be "the enemy"

Well, golly, gee-whiz, Perfesser. You've got that whole "hate the sin, love the sinner" thing going on, don't you? That maker you feel all special and superior to us poor little atheists?

[Dr. Roger Olson] I feel sorry for atheists. They are so much in the minority in American society and they are bound to feel some marginalization if not persecution.

Christians should be the last people to persecute anyone -- including atheists. But that doesn't mean Christians have to accommodate atheism as they tolerate and love atheists.

We have to recognize atheists' full freedom to believe God does not exist, but we don't have to embrace atheism as a social good. In fact, I would argue that atheism has no redeeming social value.

Ah, the bigotry disguised as compassionate tough love. He's got that down to an art form. He's going to love us all into becoming good little Christian robots - whether we like it or not. Because he knows what's best for us, apparently, and we're just all deluded by Satan. You see, atheists don't really exist, according to Doc Olson.

[Dr. Roger Olson] But most atheists demonstrate their basic trust in the meaningfulness of reality by being outraged at evil and injustice, thereby demonstrating that atheism cannot be lived out consistently.

What makes something evil or unjust if nothing like God exists -- if nature is all there is? Only subjective choice either by an individual or a society. But that can change and it often does. Without God, the social prophet has no way out of relativism.

Baylor and universities like it exist to promote objective values and meaningful existence.

For them atheism is not benign, but the enemy -- even if atheists themselves are not.

Finally, let me repeat that I have nothing against atheists as persons and neither does Baylor University.

But in my opinion, they are people of character and virtue in spite of their philosophy of life -- not because of it.

People like this make me nervous. They posses an absolute fanatical certainty in this un-evidenced magical man in the sky, then they combine it with the pursuit of a selfish bit of societal acclaim for their faux-altruistic compassion towards the nasty, mislead atheists. This could lead eventually to rounding us up and herding us all into compassionate, loving "re-education centers" - for our own good, of course. Because we obviously can't be trusted to think for ourselves, according to people like Dr. Olson.

Semantic games aside, Dr. Olson, atheists and atheism aren't the enemy. Asserting that they are is adding to the problem, not helping it.

We don't want your pity, we don't want your twisted brand of selfish compassion, and we don't want your "some of my best friends are atheists" bullshit.

Tell you what - you start treating me like a fellow human, and I'll do the same. Sound fair to you?

The Christian right have been telling us for years. Secularism inevitably leads to moral turpitude and societal decay. Secular societies become communist and start worshiping de debil. They persecute good, upstanding Christians by not believing the same things they do, cats and dogs start living together in sin, and education goes into the toilet. Not to mention the awful implications of our college-age children being taught shamelessly about - *gasp* - tentacles.

So how come Norway, of which more than 70% of it's citizens can be legitimately called non-believers, is considered by The Global Peace Index to be "most peaceful country in the world"?

Surely the Christian dominionists can't be wrong about this - can they?

[link] Depending on the definition of atheism, Norway thus has between 26 percent and 71 percent atheists. The Norwegian Humanist Association is the world's largest humanist association per capita.

And what has secularism done to Norway? The Global Peace Index rates Norway the most peaceful country in the world. The Human Development Index, a comparative measure of life expectancy, literacy, education and standard of living, has ranked Norway No. 1 every year for the last five years.

Norway has the second highest GDP per capita in the world, an unemployment rate below 2 percent, and average hourly wages among the world's highest.

Yay secularism!

Richard Carnes writes a bi-weekly column for the Vail Daily newspaper. This week he wrote a really good piece called "Atheist is not a four-letter word". Read it and you'll find the same points that we make here at UTI all the time.

[Richard Carnes] Atheist is not a four-letter word. Neither is it a euphemism for devil worshiper, totalitarian dictator, child molester or moral-free heathen who reads “Nietzsche for Dummies” for philosophical reference.

An atheist is simply a non-theist, meaning one who does not believe in the existence of gods.

I liked the article, but I had to respond to one of the Christian commenters on the story.

Not only does commenter "frelor" seem to completely mis-understand Richard Carnes' very clear prose, but he also has some pretty wacky ideas about atheism, how to raise good Christian robotschildren, and a masterful plan to out-breed the dreaded Muslim menace.

More below the fold...

A few days ago Jim wrote about Spec. Jeremy Hall, a soldier assigned to Fort Riley's 97th Military Police Battalion, who filed suit against Defense Secretary Robert Gates and a "Maj. Paul Welborne". Jeremy's suit claims that after he was given permission to hold a meeting of atheists, he was harassed by a Major, and by his fellow soldiers for being an atheist. The suit also claims that the Major threatened to block his re-enlistment for being an atheist. Lately Spec. Hall has been threatened in emails and blog posts from his fellow soldiers.

The Army replied that they could not locate anyone named "Major Paul Welborne".

Well, today the suit was amended to correct the spelling of the Major's name. It is "Major Freddy Welborn", and lawdy, lawdy, he's got a MySpace page. His "Interests" are:

The study of God's Word, Evangelism, Grandchildren and Family, and those Men called by God to Preach the Gospel.

Major Freddy describes himself like so:

MAJ Freddy & HIS Girl's Blurbs
About me:
Warrior for the Lord Jesus Christ. Currently serving w/3rd Inf Div Civil Military Operations (Governance) in Baghdad Iraq. Carla & I place all our Faith & Trust in our Savior the Lord Jesus - who provides eternal life to anyone that believes that he is the Son of God, that he was born of a virgin, lived as God in the flesh (as man) was crucified, died, and was buried then rose from the grave the third day, then acended to the right hand of the Father - True repentance (turning away from Sin to God) Being born again, Forgivness & Justification occure to the True Believer in Christ when Baptized w/God's Holy Spirit. He who has the Son has life, he who has not the Son of God has not life. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. It is by GRACE that we are saved thru Faith - It's a free gift and can't be earned. I love the Lord Jesus more than words can express, and seeking to gain a stronger relationship w/Him. I'll finish Bible College upon returning from Opns Iraqi Freedom.

Farther down, we see this little gem of an image.

I think he's a little, um, confused about the whole "1st Amendment" thing.

Hang in there Specialist Jeremy Hall. Don't let the godbots get you down. Stay safe.