Evil Atheist Conspiracy

We've all seen or heard some version of this: the accusation that, as atheists, we "hate God." It can come from just about any flavor of believer - Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Mormon. Though I suppose the Scientologists are exempt. Make it into a plural "the Gods" and it would probably apply to Hinduism, and most of the older religions that have since passed from favor over the centuries. I can picture one Roman senator accusing another of bringing the empire down because he wasn't sacrificing enough to the Gods, due to a lack of love and honor. And you might be next on the chopping block on the Pyramid of the Moon for ol' Huitzilopochtli if you weren't sufficiently bloodthirsty. But that's OK, you could star in Mel Gibson's movie, either way.

Anyway, the notion that atheists "hate God" has always struck me as being very insightful. No, no, not into our motivations or beliefs. Into the minds of the believers.

The Lodi City Council has apparently "found their backbone" and has voted unanimously to allow sectarian prayers before City Council meetings in direct opposition to threats of legal action against the City of Lodi by civil rights groups concerned over the clear violations against the U.S. Constitution's Establishment Clause.

So, let's look forward in time a few months. Lodi's City Council has been rolling along offering prayers in Jesus' name for a while now. They knew that this meant - in an abstract way of course - that they may at some point have to allow a non-Christian prayer before the start of the meeting. So, a Mormon Bishop is allowed to pray. Then, a Rabbi. Finally, after much deliberation, an Imam offers a prayer to Allah.

People are tense, but things go well, and the sky doesn't split apart, so they try their best to forget it ever happened, while simultaneously patting themselves on the back for their "tolerance".

Then things start to go awry.

A Raëlian Priest, or "Guide" basically forces his way to the front of the meeting, ranting about God knows what. The Master at Arms throws him out, and the City Council members all have a nervous chuckle.

A Wiccan applies to lead the Council in a skyclad ceremony. The Council members look it up and deny the application.

A Pastafarian wants to dress and talk like a pirate while holding a delicious plate of spaghetti. Denied.

A Jedi Knight wants to have everyone close the blast shield and try to "feel the force". Denied.

Suddenly, a rain of lawsuits alleging First Amendment violations descend onto the City. Religious persecution accusations are flying thick. The Council members decide that the very next wacky non-Christian nutball who applies to lead a prayer, they'll approve.

A Church of Satan Magister applies. They swallow, and approve the application.

The day comes, and all nervously await the Magister as he sweeps into the chambers. The lights dim, and with eerily glowing eyes he begins the blasphemous words for a Black Mass:

"Thou, thou who, in my capacity of Priest, I force, weather thou wilt or no, to descend into this host, to incarnate thyself into this bread Jesus, artisan of hoaxes, bandit of homages, robber of affection- hear! O lasting foulness of Bethlehem, we would have thee confess thy impudent cheats, thy inexplicable crimes!. We would drive deeper the nails into thy hands, press down the crown of thorns upon thy brow, and bring blood from the dry wounds.

Cursed Nazarene, abstractor of stupid parities, impotent king, fugitive god! O Infernal Satanic Majesty, condemn him to the pit, evermore to suffer in perpetual anguish. Bring Thy wrath upon him, O Prince of Darkness, King of Filth, Emperor of Putridity, Dark Lord Satan, hear our demands!"

Cue the lightning and fog machines and wolf howl special effects.

People freak the fuck out, cats and dogs start living together, chaos ensues, council members start raping goats right in the chambers, pregnant Christian ladies give birth to deformed monsters.

You know, the usual.

And atheists sit back and laugh. "Look," we'd say with a chuckle, "we fucking warned you morons about this six months ago! Now, grow the fuck up, stop breaking the law, and try following the Constitution. Make the council meetings secular, idiots, and pray in your own fucking church, and this won't happen ever again."

(Maybe not in those exact words... Heh.)

In spite of what a lot of believers think, I am not actually allergic to going into a church from time to time. Which, when you think of it, should actually be considered some kind of proof that God does not exist, since I haven't been struck down by lightning or anything on these occasions. But anyway, I'll go into a church for weddings and funerals, for public events, even just to enjoy the architecture and artwork.

Now I've found a new and much better reason, however: beer.

Yup, I have seen the light at The Church Brew Works. From their website:

By far, the most breathtaking element is the position of the brew house on the altar. Because the altar was built as a centerpiece of the church, the steel and copper tanks gleaming in the celestial blue backdrop is nothing less than captivating. This extraordinary view is only paralleled by the quality and taste of our beer.

Amen, Brothers & Sisters! Amen!

Too damned bad it is in Pittsburgh. Or I'd be a regular church-going fella.

Duane Blake is a Bishop in the Upland, CA 1st Ward of the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (the Mormons). He wrote a letter to the editor of the Bay Area's Contra-Costa Times, bemoaning the awful atheists trying to force all of the peaceful, persecuted Christians in America to "the religion of atheism" - by "removing God" from our government buildings, and from our society.

Notwithstanding the ludicrous notion that the absence of the word "GOD" equal "atheism" (Author's note: it doesn't. -Brent), and granting for the sake of argument the religionists assertions about this invisible god-thing, how the heck are us evil atheists supposed to "remove" a supposedly supreme magical being from anything - let alone an entire society? That doesn't make any sense even if we suspend our disbelief enough to look at it from their point of view! Preposterous!

The good Bishop says:

[link] In the great effort by many to remove God from our society they are, by default, forcing us into their belief system as an atheistic society.

There is just so much wrong here. I'll have to break it down into smaller chunks.

In the great effort by many to remove God from our society...

Where exactly is this "great effort" Bishop? Who are the "many" that you refer to? Yes, there are a few court cases a year where the Freedom From Religion Foundation, or the ACLU will sue a small city government, or a state government to stop what they believe to be gross violations of the United States constitution - specifically in reference to the establishment clause of the First Amendment.

But, "great effort"? "Many"? Please. You outnumber us nearly 9 to 1. Some of us try and address the worst civil rights and Constitutional violations in courts across the country. Yes, those cases get a lot of press because Christians are shocked - shocked I tell you! - that those uppity atheists would have the unmitigated gall to call them out for their bigotry and their dangerously theocratic, unconstitutional actions.

You also mention "removing God". This begs the question; which "God" are you referring to? Yours? Why does your particular flavor of magical man in the sky get such a prominent place on our buildings, our money, our Pledge of Allegiance, and in the speeches given by our politicians - despite the very clear concept of the separation of church and state being outlined in the First Amendment, then bolstered with 230 years of SCOTUS opinion and precedent?

...they are, by default, forcing us into their belief system as an atheistic society.

How does NOT engraving your deity's name on every new piece of masonry on government buildings at the taxpayers expense (many of whom are NOT CHRISTIAN) equal "forcing" citizens into "the religion of atheism"? How does NOT seeing "GOD" plastered all over everything strip you of your beliefs? Are your beliefs so weak that they must be constantly nurtured, and lovingly protected from criticism and - uh, absence on government buildings lest they dissapear in an instant like a soap bubble?

Goodness! What frail, delicate flowers you religious folks are! Your beliefs, so easily swept away by the cruel notion of government neutrality.

You know, the one outlined by our Constitution? The First Amendment? Heard of it before?

And just so you know, I could devote an entire post to that one stupidly willful misconception that religious folks LOVE to make. There is no excuse for an intelligent, grown adult human being to make a mistake of this nature. The phrase "religion of atheism" is something only an idiot, a religious conservative with a political axe to grind with atheists, or a very young child would say. Which are you Bishop? Let me guess.

You would think that most would say that the proposed blasphemy law in Ireland is a bad idea.

Well, you would be wrong.

[link] In the interests of rationality and common sense, the legislation should go further and label atheism a thought crime.

Things are getting really scary in Texas. I'm not kidding. Something is bubbling in the Lone Star State, and it has the stink of 100 percent pure crazy.

First, science communicator Bill Nye was booed during a lecture in Waco for insisting that the Moon reflected light from the Sun. Then we have Chuck Norris advocating for secession and installing himself as president of Texas, presumably as part of Glenn Beck's lunatic "let's bring back the utter terror we all felt after 9/11" faux-movement ("We surround them" he assures his nitwit followers).

But you already knew about that, right?

Tonight I discovered a couple more things that scared the hell out of me. This post will cover the first, because I don't want to give anyone any ulcers.

It has been a very odd morning. Just from poking around some of my usual haunts online, and following a link here and there, I've come across some weird weird stuff. There was The Tick fanboi site. And a mock Werner Herzog blog. But if you want a good long look into the face of Christian paranoia & insanity, check out this YouTube clip: Guillotine and FEMA concentration camps. That there is some pharmaceutical-grade crazy, complete with synthetic voice and scary pictures of Obama as a Hitler/Antichrist mashup.

Is it too early to start drinking? I mean, it's almost noon . . .

Jim Downey

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. -Plato

A tragedy is understood to be something that is to be avoided at all costs, something to be averted or prevented.

Reverend Gary Bonebrake of the Main Street Baptist Church in Oneonta, New York thinks that YOU are a "tragedy".

[link] ``The church of Christ is not growing,'' said the Rev. Gary Bonebrake, pastor of Main Street Baptist Church in Oneonta.``It's of deep concern to me.''

Bonebrake said human beings are ``hard wired'' to seek and know God, as a bulb needs to be fitted into an electrical socket to yield light.

``Human beings are made to know God,'' Bonebrake said. ``It's a tragedy that there is a growing number of irreligious people in our county.''

Do you feel like something tragic has happened to you? Is being irreligious a tragic thing? Obviously I don't think so, but oddly enough, I can understand why Rev. Bonebrake might think so.

I smell desperation in the Reverend's opinion - and it's a perception held by millions of religious people that us irreligious folks are going to have to work hard to counter.

Waking up and living in reality is far from tragic. I think that it is a necessary component to our species long-term survival.

What do you think?

Wow. Arkansas State Representative Richard Carroll of the Green Party introduced bill HJR1009 in the Arkansas 87th
General Assembly on 2-11-09 which seeks to amend the Arkansas state constitution to remove the language which prohibits an atheist from holding office there, or from testifying as a witness in any court case there. The resolution reads:

[link] AMENDING THE ARKANSAS CONSTITUTION TO REPEAL THE PROHIBITION AGAINST AN ATHEIST HOLDING ANY OFFICE IN THE CIVIL DEPARTMENTS OF THE STATE OF ARKANSAS OR TESTIFYING AS A WITNESS IN ANY COURT.

The bill would add the following amendment to the Arkansas constitution, strikes and all:

SECTION 1. Article 19, Section 1 of the Arkansas Constitution is repealed.

§ 1. Atheists disqualified from holding office or testifying as witness.

No person who denies the being of a God shall hold any office in the civil departments of this State, nor be competent to testify as a witness in any Court.

The original prohibition is federally unconstitutional due to the U.S. Supreme Court's 1961 decision in the famous Torcaso V. Watkins case, and cannot be enforced, but I applaud Rep. Carroll for introducing this bill. It is an important symbolic step in recognizing atheists as full citizens of the state of Arkansas.

Now we'll have to wait and see if the Arkansas legislature votes to pass this resolution.

However, given the Arkansas legislature's track record on church-state separation issues, I am not holding my breath.

I'm not going to reference an article today. Today I'm going to give an example of where theists go wrong. We have a small discussion group at work. One of the topics given today was something in the news that I hadn't read and still haven't read. The topic discussed memories from being reincarnated. One of my coworkers brought up the topic after having read something online. The coworker gave the headline which was something along the lines of, "Study shows evidence of former life memories gives credence to past life experiences!" (w/ a reference to reincarnation which I can't recall at this point, sorry)

Keep in mind, I haven't read either the article or the study. My coworker brings up this article and immediately afterward another coworker exclaims, "And you say you don't believe in God."

My immediate reply afterward was, "What? Why would you bring God into this?"

The coworker was incredulous. He wondered why an atheist would reference an article which gave the idea that reincarnation was possible.

In response to the news coverage regarding the "Atheist Bus Ad" campaign in Great Britain and other countries, the Burbank Leader asked some of their local shamans a question: "How do you deal with atheists?" I think that their answers are a good indication of how most Americans think about us atheists, when they think about us at all.

Pastor Jon Barta of the Valley Baptist church puts up with us poor, deluded souls, but makes no bones about it - he thinks that we are a bunch of fools:

By definition “reconciliation” means “harmony” or “congruity.” So there can be no true reconciliation of atheism with theism. They are mutually exclusive concepts. Likewise, you cannot experience true fulfillment in life while you live independently from God who is the Author of life. You can pursue your own interests and passions, you can be entertained and distracted, but you cannot “stop worrying and enjoy your life” while you ignore Him. That’s just one of the many reasons the Bible affirms that only the fool says in his heart “There is no God.”

Friar Vazken Movsesian, of the "In His Shoes" Mission of the Armenian Church Youth Ministries thinks that it is "impossible" to know if the old canard "there are no atheists in foxholes" is true (news flash for you Friar - it's not true). However, he's absolutely certain that there are no atheists in birthing rooms. You know, because of his own anecdotal experience.

So, he doesn't think that atheists really exist, and he justifies this by re-defining the word "God" to mean - wait for it - "love".

Abra-cadabra! It's magic! Now there are no atheists anymore!

An Armenian orthodox understanding of God begins with the simple equation that God is love. As such, when we see manifestations of love in our lives, we find the presence of God. It is timeless, dating back to the earliest moments of history and never dying — that is, it lasts forever. It’s hard to deny love because it is present in the smile of a child, in the visitor to the cancer ward, in the rescuer at the hurricane site, and in the hand that reaches out to hug you in your times of loneliness.

Accordingly, my “argument” to the atheist is not with words, but by living the life that exemplifies that love. That is, by reaching out to others, helping the needy, visiting the sick and loving all without prejudice, I make a small, but important, case for God.

Reverend C. L. "Skip" Lindeman of the La Cañada Congregational Church, first makes an atheist joke ("...all dressed up and no place to go! Har har!"), then compliments us on how well we pick up litter on the side of the freeway. He understands why some people don't believe due to the problem of evil, but then hand-waves it away with a personal declaration of faith. He believes the bus ads are good because they spur debate.

The problem of evil and the suffering of children are hard to build into a theological scheme. And yet the claim of Judeo-Christian religion is that God loves mankind and wants a relationship with us. It’s a fantastic claim, and yet I believe it. I also must thank God for the gift of faith, and even wonder why I was chosen to have faith while others have none. As far as the bus ads are concerned, good! They inspire thought and debate — so what’s wrong with that?

Rabbi Simcha Backman of the Chabad Jewish Center doesn't seem to have much of a problem with Jewish atheists. He tells them to be good people, and considers that the most important thing. However, he has a gripe about the atheist bus ads. They are arrogant! They suggest and imply that all religious people do all day is sit around and worry about things and don't enjoy their lives. He sees the ads as intentionally offensive and "belittling the intelligence" of 3/4 of the world's population.

I find it hard to comprehend why supporters of this campaign chose to aggressively intrude on other people’s comfort zones and attempted to belittle the intelligence of three quarters of the world’s population. Does their version of God-less morality allow the gratuitous hurting of others? The money expended on this silly campaign would have been better spent on a promotion that urges all Britons — and indeed all humans — to do something positive and reach out to a fellow person.

If these ads had encouraged the public — regardless of religious belief — to act with kindness, smile at a neighbor, feed a hungry child or assist an elderly individual, they would have a far more constructive impact.

So, do you feel "dealt with" now?

Sam Eldridge, a good-old boy blogger for the McCook Daily Gazette of McCook, Nebraska, ably demonstrates many of the strawman misconceptions held by Joe Sixpacks all across this nation.

[link] I don't believe in atheists. There is no credible scientific evidence that any atheist actually exist. I know there are people out there who claim that they do not believe in God, but the evidence says differently. They are really anti-God.

It is like the old 10cc song, "I'm Not In Love." Their constant denials only prove that deep down inside them, they know that God exist. You think that today's so called atheists are the first to shake their fists in the face of a Holy God? Hardly.

Look at the feeble arguments these alleged atheists come up with to explain life and Creation, I mean really, the Big Bang and Darwinism? Even ole Darwin himself admitted his goofy "theory" had gaping holes in it. I can almost hear Darwin saying, "you guys really believed this stuff?"

These folks tells their kids that their Grandpa was a monkey, and they are suppose to be the enlightened ones? Ha! You have to laugh.

You'll have to follow the link and read the whole thing. It is mind-numbingly idiotic.

I used to get all fired up and attempt to correct misconceptions like this, but I have come to the inescapable conclusion that this is akin to trying to bail out an sinking aircraft carrier with a teaspoon.

You know what? Most Americans are comfortably ignorant. They don't fucking care about the truth, or about being corrected in their misconceptions. They would rather guffaw, point and laugh and the "libruls", and get their holy dander up over the nasty, baby-eating, puppy-grinding atheists. In the minds of nearly all of middle Christian America, atheists are the new bogeymen - stalking across the landscape, demanding that all references to God (which we really believe in, but hate), anywhere are banned because they offend us. We diabolically FORCE good, God-fearing Christians to accept the satanic humanist secular Constitution - and there is nothing - NOTHING I tell you! - that they can do about it.

Because after all, they are only the poor, persecuted, helpless majority. Obviously atheists are in charge of everything important in this country. The schools, the state and federal legislatures. All politicians are atheists. All sports figures are atheists. Policemen and soldiers? Atheists.

These anti-God people know, INSIDE, Who is real and who is not real.

They should just give up now before we get really mad and start throwing lightning bolts around or something. *sigh*

Robert V. Thompson, the Chicago Examiner "Spirituality Examiner", is sympathetic to the "New Atheist" movement, specifically the Bus campaign in England. Frankly it is refreshing to have someone who claims to be sympathetic to atheists. But then he throws out the old canard about how he doesn't believe in the God we don't believe in either:

[link] I am grateful for the atheist bus campaign because the world sorely needs a larger and deeper conversation about what we mean when we speak of God. When my atheist friends tell me they don’t believe in God I ask them what they mean by the word 'God'. They usually say they don’t believe in a separate supreme being with a large ego.

Neither do I.

He then goes on to redefine this "god" thing into - well - anything. I mean, literally anything at all:

(Continued after the fold...)

So, imagine that your job is to help people. People with disabilities. People who need help with transportation, getting on and off the buses operated by the company you work for. Sometimes, these people are entirely at your mercy, trusting you to secure them safely, to see them safely to their destination.

Got it?

Now, what happens when at the end of your shift, and you're running late. There's still someone with cerebral palsy on your bus, strapped in and unable to move. The bus has gone back to the lot, rather than taking the young man to his home, as it was supposed to do. What should you do?

Well, the obvious answer is that you leave that person strapped in overnight, and make sure you don't miss the start of church. At least, that was the answer for bus matron Linda Hockaday:

You know, there's a reason why my email contact information listed here is "crap@afineline.org". Not because I don't want to hear from the many wonderful people who visit UTI, but because I want the kooks who also send me email to have to look at that address in their mailbox and think twice about what they're going to send me. It seems to me that sane people will get a small chuckle out of using that address - they get the joke - whereas the nutters will just be whipped into a greater frenzy.

Take for example one recent email I got, along with about two dozen other people. It started this way:

Subject: Nostradamus predicts the inevitable collapse of the capitalist system and the world-wide socialist revolution which follows

did you ever hear of the 1st amendment? or will you censor me like
everyone you disagree with...

the vote of the deluded, deceived, and brainwashed masses is not
valid.... it is a SHAM DEMOCRACY!

FINAL DRAFT FOR WORLD-WIDE CIRCULATION:

[Gov. Chris Gregoire] "In the state of Washington, we really fundamentally respect the rights of people to express their free speech. I happen to be a Christian, and I don't agree with the display that is up there. But that doesn't mean that as governor, I have the right to deny their ability to express their free speech."

I couldn't have said it better myself. Put a sock in it Bill O'Reilly, you wannabee theocrat.

A Christian blogger is pretty upset that us godless atheists want - *gasp* - equal rights.

[link] We all know that Judeo-Christian values have been the core of our nation’s military since the Revolutionary War and that soldiers, for centuries, have relied on The Almighty for protection during peacetime and wartime. This is just another attempt by godless leftists to chip away at the very foundation of what makes America the land of the free: God. These people must be chomping at the bit for Barack Obama to take office so that they finally have a sympathetic ear - someone who shares their affinity for a godless America.

Any time I see the words “We all know…”, I check my wallet because someone is trying to sell me a pig in a poke.

I noticed that she filed this post under “Our Enemies”. Does she truly consider her fellow American citizens - who just happen to be godless - as her “enemies”?

Truly?

If so, why? What the heck did we ever do to her? I mean, we are indeed trying to get her to follow the law and the Constitution - to respect our civil right not to be *forced* to attend a prayer function that we do not believe in. But other than that, what’s the problem? Don’t we have that right under the law and the Constitution’s Bill of Rights?

Doesn't she want to follow the law and the Constitution? Does she want to be an outlaw instead? Take over the government and force all of us uppity godless atheists into re-education camps? Have mandatory prayers, oh say five times a day? Blasphemy laws? Prison for “admitted atheists”? A return to McCarthyism? Purges? Theocracy? With her own personal flavor of theological lunacy at the helm?

What *exactly* is she getting at here?

Please forgive me, and everyone else in America who does not share her religion, if we say “no thanks”.

Let’s just stick to the Constitution, shall we? She is not “more equal” than anyone else. She needs to get over it.

Jim Griffith, an op-ed columnist at the Times-Herald in Georgia, decided to write what he undoubtedly thought was a pithy, wry, down-home tongue-in-cheek column for the Saturday edition.

What happened instead is that he showed showed what a bigot he is, and how ignorant he is about atheists and Thanksgiving.

In one column, three short paragraphs, he claims to have intimate knowledge of what all atheists think and feel at Thanksgiving. He implies that we lack friends and families, and that we are miserable and confused about whether or not a god exists, or whether or not we have 'souls', etc.

Oh yeah - let us not forget that according to good-old Jimbo us atheists are nothing more than God's end-of-the-week "mistakes" that He created when He was tired.

Who knew that an omnipotent being could get tired? (Sounds pretty fishy to me...)

[link] A few religious thoughts to ponder

Thanksgiving must be a terrible time for atheists. They have no God to thank.

They do not have the privilege of gathering with family and friends to express gratitude by saying: "Praise God from whom all blessings flow." An atheist on his deathbed faces serious uncertainties. Gazing upward, he pleads: "Oh God, if there is a God, please save my soul -- if I have one."

This shows that when God created man, our Heavenly Father wanted to let us know He was big enough to make a mistake, or perhaps this is a better explanation: "God made man at the end of the week when He was tired."

The fun part of all this though is the comment section of the article. It is, at this time, 100% full of atheists telling old Jim that he's a bigoted moron. So much so that I'll bet every time he burps this week it tastes like feet.

I'm thankful for my fellow atheists who don't let crap like this slip under the radar. Great job!

Copyright © 2008 by Sidney Harris.

In Manatee County, Florida there is a "special" club that has just formed called "The Miracle Club". This is a club that focuses on telling tall tales Real True Stories™ about their experiences in order to help all of those atheists and misguided doubters who have been "sucked into scientific materialism" know that their own flavor of magical god-thing exists and that the materialists "need to know Him".

Welcome to the pat-yourself-on-the-back-for-being-so-dang-holy club.

[link] Scheele said he became excited about Smith's idea because of his own concern about what he termed "frontal attacks on Christianity and religion in general." He pointed to several books that decry religion.

"These are people who are not just atheists, they're anti-theists," he said. "They don't just believe there's no God, they believe religion is a pox and a disease and it's dangerous."

Yup. Absolutely correct. You know why? Because most religion is a pox and a disease and dangerous.

To rebut the idea that science cannot support the idea of God, the Miracle Club can play an important role, he said.

"The idea behind the Miracle Club is very simple: If there is no God, how can miracles occur?" he said.

Indeed. How can miracles occur Mr. Sheely? I'll tell you. Magic. That's how.

"There are other ways of refuting the anti-God lie, but one of the most spectacular and encouraging is to share the miracles that occur in people's lives that can't be explained scientifically at all."

Uh-huh. Because anecdotal evidence is used all the time in scientific experiments.

Why, just the other day I was reading an abstract from the prestigious scientific peer-reviewed journal "Personal Anecdotes From The Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences" called "Natural selection of FLT1 alleles and their association with malaria resistance in utero^*" - and this is what it had to say:

We heard some stories about placental malaria (PM) that may be, according to some third-party sources who had a dream about it, caused by Plasmodium falciparum contributes significantly to infant mortality in sub-Saharan Africa and is associated with pregnancy loss. We hypothesized that fetal genes that modify PM would be associated with fetal fitness. Dr. Muehlenbachs told a story about his brother who knew some guy who said that during PM, placental trophoblasts produce soluble fms-like tyrosine kinase 1 (sFlt1), also known as soluble VEGF receptor 1, an angiogenesis inhibitor associated with preeclampsia. Here we present a bunch of uncorroborated stories about examining the genotype of the fms-related tyrosine kinase 1 (FLT1) 3? UTR in Tanzanian mother–infant pairs.

Gosh! If those nasty atheist/scientific materialists can't see the hard science that forms the basis of The Miracle Club, I guess they won't ever know about the loving majesty and grandeur that is Binky the Magic Space Clown.

David Doster writing in the Faith & Values section of the Morganton.com News Herald in North Carolina quotes Chuck Colson from his book "The Faith":

[Chuck Colson] "The gentleman seated next to me greeted me with a blunt warning that he was an atheist. I looked at him for a moment — graying temples, a wise expression, handsomely attired — the very image of a community leader. I told him I was glad to sit next to him because 'I've never really met an atheist.'

As his eyebrows arched, I explained, 'An atheist believes the existence of God can be disproved. So please, tell me how you've done that.'

He looked momentarily uncomfortable, 'Well, perhaps I should say I'm an agnostic.'

'When did you give up studying about God?' I asked.

Now his neck began to redden. He admitted he'd never really tried.

'But an agnostic is one who says he doesn't think God can be known, and you can only be an agnostic if you've tried to know Him and exhausted the search.'

I'm not sure even now what made me so bold, but I added, 'So I would say that while you appear to be a very well-educated person, you've made an unsupportable statement.'

Not surprisingly, he was offended and rather quiet for the rest of the evening.

Ah, yes. You are so very clever, Sensei Colson. You have vanquished the mighty atheist strawman with your incisive, never-before-heard questions and cutting insight into the human psyche.

Colson is a tool, folks. No atheist actually thinks that atheism means "believing the existence of God can be disproved". The very idea is laughable.

Atheism indicates one single thing; the absence of god-belief within a human being. That's all, nothing else.

If the only way apologists can think of to "fight against atheism" is to redefine it into something they can "fight against", then we should stop engaging them. Engaging with them gives credence to their silly strawmen. We have to spend time first explaining why their argument is against a strawman in the first place - but by then they have galloped off into the distance, squawking and screeching like agitated spider monkeys.

Not so S-M-R-T.